Romancing the Capital 2018

Hey! I'm still alive, lack of posts being evidence to the contrary. Things went a little—okay, a lot—sideways over the last couple of weeks, and then there was the brilliant Romancing the Capital conference right after, and between all that, I basically dropped all the balls. First, a quick update on the sideways: His Fluffy …

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Impact, Intent, and Queering While Queer

First, impact. Even though I've got a feeling I'm about to write a long post, I want to make sure the first and clearest thing is this: I'm sorry. I wrote a tweet recently (or, rather, a quote-tweet). This one: It hurt people. Specifically: between "normalize" in the original tweet and "that's not how any …

#PrideMonth — Family Values

I live in a bubble. More specifically, I live in a queer, lower-case-L liberal bubble. I often hear people refer to living in a bubble as a bad thing, and I do understand why. The bubble gives you a skewed view of what you think most people think. Talking about queer rights in my bubble doesn't …

#PrideMonth — What’s the Opposite of Queer?

Pride Month is here, and in the last five days I've already seen more than a few references to who Pride is or isn't for. A few of those references I can agree with (say, for example, agreeing that Pride is not for empowered organizations who carry guns and wear uniforms). But then the other …

#PrideMonth — Closets

I saw a lovely post yesterday that reminded everyone celebrating Pride to remember that being out is not synonymous with pride nor queerness, and it reminded me of conversations I've had over the years about the whole notion of "coming out," and the how the single most misunderstood thing about "coming out" when I have …

Queer Doesn’t Mean Romance

Given recent discussions, I've reworked a blog post originally meant for a bit later this month and I'm posting it today. I've got a couple more on similar themes, but I don't want to lump them all in together. Today I'm talking kinda-sorta about romance, but specifically the relationship between romance and queerness and how …